by Caitlin

Oh, boy. I knew nothing about the X-Files, and frankly not much more about Star Trek: TNG. At the end of this experiment, all I now know that I didn’t know is that the Mulder and Scully work for the FBI, and that Data is the Chief Operations Officer on the Enterprise. Oh, and that Gillian Anderson played Scully, not Mulder, but I digress. In this fic, Jean Luc Picard uses the Holodeck to try and chase some tail – not unlike some TNG episodes I’ve seen – and finds himself trying to capture the heart of that damned elusive Pimpernel* the elusive Dana Scully. 

*sorry, wrong fic!


“Computer – run protocol 432.5 – Extra Terrestrial Files.”

“Captain, you’re not planning to visit that protocol again – ?”

“Yes Data – there’s something about that Agent Dana Scully that captures my curiosity. Strong, brave, brilliant – my kind of woman.”

Captain Picard smiled wistfully, and ignored the confused look on the android’s face. For someone ever on the path to greater humanity, there was much Data didn’t understand.

The captain approached the doors to the holodeck, and steeled himself for the upcoming encounter with the red-headed siren who had captured his heart. The doors slid open with a mechanical hiss, and he stepped through without another word to his confused Chief Operations Officer.

He was immediately surrounded by the alien-yet-familiar setting of late 20th century Earth.

As if on cue, a beautiful red-head in a well-tailored black suit approached him on foot, a large piece of metallic alien technology clutched in her hands. Upon seeing Picard, she slowed to a stop and said, desperately, “thank god you’re here – I managed to escape the aliens’ underground base, and I was able to get this nuclear device away from them – had to fight my way through a dozen of them – but I need a second set of hands to get this thing disarmed, and quick. The fate of our very planet depends on it – will you help me?”

Picard fought back the smile and said, “of course Agent Scully – I was sent from headquarters for this exact reason. Walk me through it.”

And she did. Picard found himself impressed anew at the calm, masterful way Scully handled the stressful situation of saving the entire human race from total annihilation.

* * * *

When the work was done, and the day was saved, Picard braced himself for the moment he was always unprepared for – it was time to end their mission without saying good bye.

Scully approached, the toll the day’s activities had taken on her clear on her face. “Well, Agent Picard, if you hadn’t been here, I doubt if I could’ve stopped atomizer – I owe you a debt a gratitude; the world does.”

Jean Luc felt a flush of pride spreading across his cheeks, all the way up his shining pate. “Only doing my duty,” he smiled. “I would never have been able to do it without your skillful leadership. You are an incredible person, Agent Scully.”

“Thank you, Agent Picard,” she said, blushing slightly. “I’ll admit that, in an organization as male-dominated as the FBI, it’s nice to hear that one is doing well.”

“Your modesty is unbecoming of someone who is so obviously talented. I wonder, Agent Scully, if you would do me the honor of joining me for dinner, tonight.” He held his breath – he had never yet been able to persuade Dana to join him for a meal. Instead –

“It’s most thoughtful of you, Agent Picard, but I’m afraid it’s completely out of the question – you know there are rules against fraternizing between agents. Though I must say – ” here she lowered her piercing eyes bashfully – “I’ve not yet been so tempted to violate protocol.”

“The truth is, Agent Scully – I’m not an agent,” Jean Luc said, desperately. “I’m the captain of a starship from four hundred years in your future – after tonight I will leave this planet and never return. Would you do me the honor of passing the hours before my departure with me?” His eyes caught her gaze, and he watched her considering what he’d said. Surely a woman who fought extraterrestrial invasion could believe in a bit of time travel-?

“I want to believe,” she said, her pulse and mind racing wildly.

Picard’s heart skipped a beat – had he finally found his way to through to her heart…?

His thoughts were interrupted by a pair of soft lips gently brushing against his own. He gasped at the sudden, intimate touch, his hopes suddenly skyrocketing –

“You’re very sweet, Jean Luc. But,” Scully sighed sadly, “my duty comes first. Maybe someday…”

Picard couldn’t stop the tears that welled up and pooled in his eyes. He blinked them back rapidly, and cleared his throat roughly. “A rain check, then, Agent Scully?”

“Yes… a rain check.”

* * * *

Data could tell by the slump of the captain’s shoulders that all had not gone well. “Captain, I – ”

“Computer – re-run protocol 432.5,” Picard interrupted his Chief Operations Officer. “I want to believe…”